the bearings of life…

I am trying to work my way through the effects of the Infernal Dark Mother. Will I face her gnashing teeth and slip through? Will I die in the attempt? Will I lose my soul and become only the receptacle of an evil that works me like a puppeteer works her toys? There are no guarantees of anything but the eventual death of the body, and until then of the passage of Time. I am less focused now than ever I have been, and I keep trying to tell myself that: “This is a good thing.” I’m not trying so hard to control things, but at the same time I find that all the dreams by which I determined the bearings of my life are slipping away.

I had to drive off my once friend the vampire. It was no good anymore. How could it go on? We had become different species. We at best might’ve been like pets to one another if she never felt the need to feed — if that happened I would have merely been  energy food. Still — I miss her & the state of Virginia. I received an e-mail music schedule from a coffeehouse I visited in Crozet,  tonight and it sent my mind reeling. 

(C) Tobeimean Peter 2011


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